Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Ode to the Baby Maker

Today you will be leaving me. I thank you for housing my four children, but your lack of cooperation over the years has left me wanting....not to mention inconvenienced, embarrassed and, at times, literally home bound. But not anymore. Today will be a new start for me. After my recovery process is over, there will be no more pain, bloating or the stockpiling of feminine hygiene products. No more unexpected "red alerts". No more planning around you. Once you're gone, all my other bits and pieces will be returned to their rightful place. I will be jumping on trampolines. I will be able to sneeze or cough without crossing my legs. Rest in peace, my reproduction organs. I will not miss you. Not even a little bit. **I will be at "the spa" until Friday or Saturday.....:):):)

16 comments:

TrishAnderson said...

I hope you will be feeling well very soon! You are in my thoughts and prayers today!

Jalene said...

Good luck! I will be praying for you!

Adrian said...

Good luck!! My mom-in-law recently said goodbye to her friend and hasn't missed him one bit! Hope everything goes well. Is it bad to say I'm a little jealous?!? I guess I have a few more babies to make before my time comes...

Linda / Behind My Red Door said...

I wish you a very speedy recovery Jo-anne. May your days free from more pain, bloating or the stockpiling of feminine hygiene products be as blissful as mine have been for 25 years!!

hugs, Linda

Gayle said...

Wishing you a speedy recovery and a wonderful new life!

This Country Girl said...

That is so funny, Jo-Anne! Good for you! Enjoy that spa too!

Thanks for the prayers for Colt too!

Tammy

Leslie said...

Jo-Anne,
You are so silly! I like how you wrote that.:)

Many people don't know how to handle the idea of being completely finished having children. Some find the idea to be so wrong. I think when we know we're done and over it, it's just such a rewarding and satisfying feeling. Many people I know still think it's horrible that my husband went for a vasectomy nearly 4 years ago but we knew enough was enough and it was the best decision we made. No more surprises :)

Hope you recover fast and feel just as great afterwards as you think you will!

Have a great day :)

Leslie

Julie said...

Great post--you make me laugh. Best wishes on a speedy recovery. I'v already told my husband when we create our world that we are evening out the body parts a little better!!:) Take care---Julie

LaurieJ said...

Good luck with everything!!
I hope your 'spa' trip goes well and you feel much rejuvinated when you get home...

Kim said...

You will LOVE it! I went to the "SPA" last year because I was having similar troubles. They fixed me up right good! I'm so glad I did it! It was scary there for a while but all is well now.

I will keep you in my prayers!

Gail said...

Good for you. Keith and I have talked about this lately. Let me know how it goes and I will say an extra pray for you.

Thimbleanna said...

Good Luck Jo-Anne!!!! I was ecstatic the day they ripped my baby maker out -- and I've felt SO much better ever since!

sharla@mylittlegems said...

hey- good to talk to you and I'm so glad you got a private room! Since you are coming home Sat. I will bring dinner Sat. I'll call your house tomorrow! :) get well!!

Anonymous said...

Hi JoAnne,
I am thinking of you and I know you will feel soooo much better.
Just be sure to keep ahead of the pain. Don't let it get ahead of you. It just takes too much energy away from your body healing itself to fight the pain.
I had mine out 5 years ago and if I had known I would feel as well as I do now, I would have had it done years ago. Take care. xox Pennee

Andrea said...

I haven't been peeking around blogland for awhile. And look what I find. Love this post! I'm laughing! Here's to a new life that is much deserved.

Shumaker Family said...

Jo-Anne, I love how you are saying goodbye... and the "I will be able to sneeze or cough without crossing my legs"... hahahh SERIOUSLY! I love you!!!!!!

Call me when you can.